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Bud Grossmann’s
Words of the Week
for the Week of
May 10, 2009
Previously unpublished fiction.
© 2009 by Bud Grossmann.
All Rights Reserved.
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Girl With a Gun, 2003
© 2003 by Bud Grossmann
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WHAT WE’VE GOT HERE
Are you aware, Jessie, that one of the principle rules of gun safety is Handle every firearm as if it were loaded?
I tried one time, in my parents’ living room, to explain this to my friend Suzie. She had admired a Ruger .357 revolver and asked to hold it. I told Suzie the Rule, flipped the cylinder out, showed her all the chambers were empty, snapped the cylinder back in place, and handed the pistol to her.
“Ohh! It’s heavy!” Suzie said, and she pointed it straight at my mother.
I pushed the barrel aside and repeated the Rule.
Suzie was puzzled. “Dave,” she said, “you just showed me that the gun is not loaded. What’s the problem?”
I have begun to think of Suzie whenever you, Jessie, ask me if I watched this or that show on television. I don’t have cable, I don’t have satellite, I don’t have an antenna hook-up. Except for keeping up with Jon Stewart on my computer, I avoid watching television almost every chance I get.
But keep asking, if you wish. Perhaps I’ll someday say, “Mm-hmm, yes, I did see that on television.”
Lotta people been blown away by an empty pistol.
Or so I heard somewhere. Not sure where. Mighta been on TV. ♦
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